5 things that make your SEO agency’s website look ridiculous

Recently, we’ve been doing a bit of prospecting, which has meant trawling the SERPs looking for SEO agencies. Frankly, I’ve been pretty shocked by just how bad some of these sites are, so I decided to compile a list of the most offensive things you can have on an agency website.

iStock images

Take some real pictures of your staff and your quirky, beanbag-filled office, don’t resort to naff iStock images like these:

The Yuppie – The internet didn’t even exist when this lad was toting his Filofax and a house brick sized Motorola. He makes you look more like Trotters Independent Traders than a reputable agency:


Let's touch base on those directory submissions...

Fruit – What does fruit have to do with SEO, or for that matter any other B2B service?? Oh look, it’s an apple but actually there’s an orange inside it – you must be a really innovative and forward-thinking company! Although you’re not, because your website looks like it hasn’t been updated since the days of dial-up.


Show them you 'think outside the box' with an apple/orange

Generic phone woman – If I had a pound for every time I have seen this young lady…

generic phone woman

Silly names

Why do so many agencies feel the need to give themselves a ridiculous name? Over the past few years we’ve seen a pattern emerging, with the following formula:

colour or adjective + animal + ‘solutions’, ‘media’, ‘creative’ (delete as applicable)

We used this to create our silly agency name generator game.

The silly agency name generator game

Guaranteed first page rankings

Even those with very limited SEO knowledge will know that even God himself couldn’t guarantee a first page ranking, don’t insult your customers’ intelligence by claiming that you can.

Long tail keywords

Any SEO agency that’s worth its salt will be able to give some great examples of generic phrases that they’ve achieved rank on. When that keyword is ‘Skip hire in the north west’, you’re not impressing anybody.

Where do you rank on Dogpile?

Where do you rank on Dogpile?

Defunct search engines

Let’s be honest, people only really care about Google, and at a push Yahoo! & Bing. Mentions of Altavista and Ask Jeeves make your agency look well past its sell by date.


8 thoughts on “5 things that make your SEO agency’s website look ridiculous

  1. Darren

    Guaranteed page one listing with a keyword phrase 6 words long that no one is ever gonna type into the big G.

    Anyone who is any good at SEO would never need to offer their services to anyone.

    1. Mark Morgan

      I actually know someone who has the term “SEO Guru” on their LinkedIn profile. And using nothing but SERPS and claiming that high rankings for long tail phrases constitutes success is about the only trick the guy has in his, and I qoute, “skills sets”. Great post Martin, made me chuckle.

  2. SEO

    Why do so many agencies feel the need to give themselves a ridiculous name? Over the past few years we’ve seen a pattern emerging, with the following formula:

    It doesn’t matter where in the world you are, SEO UK techniques and tactics are the same. The manner and professionalism with which they are implement.

  3. Rick Middleton

    Not that in depth but straight to the point, I wonder how many sites actually use that image of the woman on the headset on their homepage, just looks so cheap and tacky.

    There are so many SEO’s out there that believe that they can guarantee a page one position, its a bit ridiculous since your effectively confident in your own skills and guaranteeing that Google will always be to!

    Heres a pretty good assessment of what people should be wary of when looking for an SEO company..

    I also agree with the bit about using a wordpress template as your blog, sorry!


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>

Are you human? Click the Apple...